Crazy Awesome

Welcome to the antidote.

Who does Sarah Brightman think she is? October 5, 2008

I was surfing a minute ago, and I came across the following promotional pictures for Sarah Brightman’s new album, “A Winter Symphony”.  She is in such hardcore denial about getting older, for real.  Not only that, but the older she gets, the trashier she gets.  Check out the awesomely fake hair, for example.

Sexy braids there, Sarah. SUPER sexy.

Ok, and guys – she’s 48 years old.  This is the bitch that “The Phantom of the Opera” was WRITTEN for.  In 1986.  I was three.  And check this out:

 

This is one of those pics that make you nervous, because you can't TELL if you're seeing nipple or not.  WHY?

This is one of those pics that make you nervous, because you can't TELL if you're seeing nipple or not. WHY?

I thought her last album cover was bad.  I mean, she has a rockin’ body, no doubt.  But she also hires people to airbrush the SHIT out of her photos.

 

The back cover of Sarah Brightman's 2001 album, "Classics".

The back cover of Sarah Brightman's 2001 album, "Classics".

I can’t take it for real.  And her music is CRAP.  I’m sorry – I really tried.  And I like musical theatre.  In fact I went and saw Spring Awakening on Broadway today.  It won the Tony in 2007, and I’ve been dying to see it since I moved here.  Hunter Parrish, who plays Silas on “Weeds”, is playing the lead right now – and he did a fabulous job and is actually a really talented singer.  Who knew!  He’s so cute too.  I just can’t quit him.  

(This is him…)

 

Parrish on "Weeds", with costars Mary Louise Parker and Alexander Gould.

Parrish on "Weeds", with his costars Mary Louise Parker (love!) and Alexander Gould.

 …

 

Back to the point.  Sarah Brightman is working really, really hard for such terrible, pointless “pop” music.  

Do like her?

 

Brooke Hogan has no taste, continued… October 3, 2008

White trash runs in the Hogan family.

Check out Brooke Hogan, at the Bejeweled Swimwear show on October 1st.

Why won't someone LOVE ME, already!?

Why won't someone just LOVE ME, already?!

Take note, all you tan-a-holics: too much fake tanning makes you look like you’re 20 years older than you are!  No one wants to date a leather face.

 

(P.S.  Did you guys see that her mom was recently arrested for speeding, 20 miles over the limit?  No joke.  And this is after her son got in such a huge speeding wreck his best friend, 22-year old John Graziano, is in a coma and will likely remain so.  What a f@#$ing douchebag.)

 

Trash, trash, trash.

Trash, trash, trash.

 

Princesses Fug & Fuglier, at your service.

Poor Sarah Ferguson.  I’m going to be really sad if my kids are as unfortunate as hers are.  Because let’s face it – there’s no way you can’t take that shit personally.

 

Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie @ the launch of Form, a luxury menswear brand designed by Petra Ecclestone - the 19-year-old daughter of F1 millionaire Bernie Ecclestone.

Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie @ the launch of Form, a luxury menswear brand designed by Petra Ecclestone - the 19-year-old daughter of F1 millionaire Bernie Ecclestone.

At least Eugenie dresses moderately, doesn’t have crazy eyes, and knows to keep her mouth shut.  Princess Beatrice, on the other hand, is dressed in an apron (as befits a redheaded stepchild).  Can’t she afford a stylist?  I don’t understand!

 

Slut of the week: Girls Next Door’s Kendra Wilkinson

Kendra Wilkinson, one of Hugh Hefner’s “Girls Next Door”, hosting a party in the Dominican Republic last weekend.  Enjoy:

Nothing says class like flashing your titties.

Nothing says class like flashing your titties.

(P.S.  Note the super happy dykes in the back of the shot.  Lol!)

 

Fugalicious Fergie-spawn September 29, 2008

Ok.  I don’t mean to be mean, but seriously: Princess Beatrice is NOT CUTE.

Witness and be converted:

 

This weekend, at a London pub w/ friends.

This weekend, at a London pub w/ friends.

Not convinced?  Here’s further proof that the the Duchess of York’s daughter is something of a butter face. 

 

Beatrice and her mom, Fergie.

Beatrice and her mom, Fergie.

Don’t princesses get etiquette lessons?  WHY IS HER MOUTH ALWAYS OPEN?