Crazy Awesome

Welcome to the antidote.

CHALLENGE TO CONSERVATIVES: Why Palin? October 7, 2008

I genuinely don’t understand the affection for Sarah Palin.  To me she comes across as uninformed, unprepared, ignorant, and condescending to the American people.  But an awful lot of people are rooting for her, and I would like to learn why.

Here’s my challenge to conservatives:  Why do you like Sarah Palin, other than that she’s an “average Joe” that people can relate to? I want to hear why people think she’d make a good vice president, not why people want to have her over for dinner.  Sabes?

INFORM ME!

Why do you like her?  I don't get it!

Why do you like her? I don't get it!

(P.S. Liberals – exercise your right to free speech too!)

 

Shiloh is getting so BIG!

Angelina Jolie was snapped out walking with kids Pax (4), Zahara (3), and Shiloh Nouvel (2) yesterday in New Orleans, Louisiana.

Shiloh is already half the size of Angelina!  I wonder if she’ll be tall like her daddy?

 

A very Bond suprise

The Daily Mail UK (one of my fav gossip sites) is reporting that new Bond girl Gemma Arterton, who’ll be starring opposite Daniel Craig in the upcoming “Quantum of Solace” flick, was born with six fingers on each hand.

She was apparently operated on as a very young child, in order to have the extra appendages removed, but she still has little bumpy scars to remind her.

Crazy!

She has a beautiful smile, no?

She has a beautiful smile, no?

The Daily Mail also recently revealed, in a total spoiler, how Gemma’s character will die in the next Bond film.  I won’t let the cat out of the bag, but it has something to do with this:

Ay, mami!

Ay, mami!

Other than the shit theme song co-written by Alicia Keys and the White Stripes’ Jack White, I’m really pleased with the direction the Bond conglomerate has been heading lately.  I will always have a spot in my heart (and bed, let’s be honest) for Pierce Brosnan, but I never really believed he could kick some undercover ass.  Daniel Craig, on the other hand, is entirely believable.  He’s more of a Roger Moore type of Bond – rough around the edges, not formulaicly handsome, and, well, ROCK DIESEL.  Gemma is also not a standard beauty.  Her body obviously has that tall, leggy Geena Davis thing happening.  But her face is a little quirky, and to me that makes her a) a more interesting character, and b) MORE beautiful.

So, you know, good work Bond Enterprises.  Good work.  (Now get a new theme song, and pronto!)

 

Stars come out for Women In Hollywood Tribute

The ladies really came together last night for Elle magazine’s 15th annual Women in Hollywood Tribute.  Some of them were as fashion fabulous as always, while others were … not.  Let the glamour begin:

“HOT” COUTURE:

Nicole Kidman, in a gorgeous green dress & salmon heels.  My favorite part, however, is the stylish oversized clutch!

Nicole Kidman, in a gorgeous green dress & salmon heels. My favorite part, however, is the stylish over-sized clutch!

Anne Hathaway, stunning as usual.

Anne Hathaway, stunning as usual. Check out the foxy shoes!

Halle Berry.  The dress is a bit unusual, and not doing amazing things for her post-Nahla tummy.  That being said, it's a beautiful silhouette, something the red carpet hasn't seen, and - of course - she's pulling it off.

Halle Berry. The dress is a bit unusual, and not doing amazing things for her post-Nahla tummy. That being said, it's a beautiful silhouette, something the red carpet hasn't seen, and - of course - she's pulling it off.

NOT COUTURE:

This dress is sooooooo boring, shapeless, unflattering, and unfashionable.  Also, I'm sort of just sick of Eva Mendes' FACE.

TThis dress is sooooooo boring, shapeless, unflattering, and unfashionable. Also, I'm sort of just sick of Eva Mendes' FACE.

It's not so much that I hate this dress as that I hate Nicolette Sheridan.  She has such a nasty, conniving face.  She also doesn't know how to carry herself.  No matter what she's wearing, it reads "I'm a cougar.  I'm still sexy.  Do me!"  Gross.

It's not so much that I hate this dress as that I hate Nicolette Sheridan. She has such a nasty, conniving face. She also doesn't know how to carry herself. No matter what she's wearing, it reads "I'm a cougar. I'm still sexy. Do me!" Gross.

Ok - this one is totally the dress' fault.  I love Jenny McCarthy, but there is too much happening on this dress.  It looks she intercepted some curtains bound for a Victorian museum somewhere.  Suffocating and overly elaborate.

Ok - this one is totally the dress' fault. I love Jenny McCarthy, but there is too much happening on this dress. It looks she intercepted some curtains bound for a Victorian museum somewhere. Suffocating and overly elaborate.

 

How Sarah Palin figures out what to say in public… October 6, 2008

See below, for an apt illustration of how Sarah Palin navigates questions in debates and interviews.

If you think it’s not true – look at the stats.  Since Barack named Joe Biden as his running mate, Biden’s done over 100 interviews/debates/etc.  Palin has done three, all of which were total disasters.  You don’t think so?  Hmmm…maybe you don’t remember this hot mess:

It was so rich in satire material that Tina Fey and Amy Poehler clearly couldn’t resist.  Hence last week’s SNL Palin/Couric spoof.

All signs are pointing to (let me hear it now!) Sarah Palin being woefully unprepared for the role of vice president of the United States of America.  You betcha!

(P.S.  Thanks to my Danish buddy Kathrine for the hilarious debate chart!)

 

First pics of Henry Story Driver, Minnie Driver’s baby boy!

Little Henry Story Driver is such a cute little CHUNK!  I love it!  Wee Henry was born to Minnie Driver, best known for costarring with Matt Damon and Ben Affleck in Good Will Hunting, on September 9th.

Minnie, who is currently starring on the FX cable TV series “The Riches” with British comedian Eddie Izzard, has refused to divulge the identity of the baby daddy.  There is speculation, however, that it’s musician Craig Zolezzi.

Craig Zolezzi

Despite lots of pressure to spill the beans, Minnie has stayed strong and maintained her privacy.  She doesn’t care what anyone thinks of her having a child “out of wedlock”, and I admire for it.  She’s even gone so far as to tell the New York Post, “I’m not married and I don’t know if I’ll stay with the guy.”

You tell ’em, Minnie.

She also said, “It’s great to be an independent creature. Today you don’t need a man any more.  In the old days, a baby without marriage and people would put you out. I’m very into feeling this female thing.”

Me too!

What do you guys think?

 

Christina Aguilera has been looking like a TRANNY. October 5, 2008

Christina, what is going on with your makeup lately?  You look.  Like a tranny.

 

Hot mess.

Hot mess.

 

OMG, seriously.  Who is doing her makeup!?

OMG, seriously. Who is doing her makeup!?

 

I guess I’m not THAT surprised though.  Miss Chris is not exactly known for her subtle fashion sense. Remember this?

 

There just isn't a good excuse for that hair.  That ass, on the other hand...

There just isn't a good excuse for that hair. That ass, on the other hand...

 I miss smokin’ hot Christina.  Come back mami!

 

Hey sexy!

Hey sexy!

 

Who does Sarah Brightman think she is?

I was surfing a minute ago, and I came across the following promotional pictures for Sarah Brightman’s new album, “A Winter Symphony”.  She is in such hardcore denial about getting older, for real.  Not only that, but the older she gets, the trashier she gets.  Check out the awesomely fake hair, for example.

Sexy braids there, Sarah. SUPER sexy.

Ok, and guys – she’s 48 years old.  This is the bitch that “The Phantom of the Opera” was WRITTEN for.  In 1986.  I was three.  And check this out:

 

This is one of those pics that make you nervous, because you can't TELL if you're seeing nipple or not.  WHY?

This is one of those pics that make you nervous, because you can't TELL if you're seeing nipple or not. WHY?

I thought her last album cover was bad.  I mean, she has a rockin’ body, no doubt.  But she also hires people to airbrush the SHIT out of her photos.

 

The back cover of Sarah Brightman's 2001 album, "Classics".

The back cover of Sarah Brightman's 2001 album, "Classics".

I can’t take it for real.  And her music is CRAP.  I’m sorry – I really tried.  And I like musical theatre.  In fact I went and saw Spring Awakening on Broadway today.  It won the Tony in 2007, and I’ve been dying to see it since I moved here.  Hunter Parrish, who plays Silas on “Weeds”, is playing the lead right now – and he did a fabulous job and is actually a really talented singer.  Who knew!  He’s so cute too.  I just can’t quit him.  

(This is him…)

 

Parrish on "Weeds", with costars Mary Louise Parker and Alexander Gould.

Parrish on "Weeds", with his costars Mary Louise Parker (love!) and Alexander Gould.

 …

 

Back to the point.  Sarah Brightman is working really, really hard for such terrible, pointless “pop” music.  

Do like her?

 

Tina Fey rips Palin ANOTHER asshole with SNL VP debate spoof.

I seriously hope Tina Fey gets an Emmy for her comedy work on SNL during the 2008 election.  Because this shit is amazing.  Queen Latifah (as the debate moderator) is such a blunt instrument of an “actress”, and Jason Sedakis (as Joe Biden) was a little obvious too – but who the f@#$ cares, for real.  Tina Fey as Sarah Palin was, as usual, SPOT on.  As my new roomie Joannah said last night, “It’s even funnier b/c half of it is taken verbatim!”  So true, JoJo, so true.

Some of my favorite moments:

 

“I think marriage should be a sacred institution between two unwilling teenagers.” (LOL!)

“I love Israel so much.  Bless it’s heart.”

“Oh, are we not doing the talent portion?” (Plays a flute)

“And for all of you Joe-Six-Packs at home playin’ a drinkin’ game: Maverick!” (Takes a ghost-swig.) – this one in particular made us laugh because, as you’ll remember from my vp debate breakdown, we actually tried to PLAY that drinking game. =)  Good times.

 

 

What’s up with The Killers new song, “Human”?

The Killers.

The Killers.

 

Have you guys heard The Kills new song, “Human”?  The lyrics are SO indulgent, SO self-conscious, and SO bad.  Check it out.

Human Lyrics

I did my best to notice
When the call came down the line
Up to the platform of surrender
I was brought but i was kind
And sometimes i get nervous
When i see an open door
Close your eyes 
Clear your heart…
Cut the chord

Are we human?
Or are we dancer?
My sign is vital
My hands are cold
And I’m on my knees
Looking for the answer
Are we human?
Or are we dancer?

Pay my respects to grace and virtue
Send my condolences to good
Give my reguards to sorer moments
They always did the best they could
And so long to devotion
You taught me everything i know
Wave goodbye
Wish me well..
You’ve got to let me go

Are we human?
Or are we dancer?
My sign is vital
My hands are cold
And I’m on my knees
Looking for the answers
Are we human?
Or are we dancer?

Will your system be alright
When you dream of home tonight?
There is no message we’re receiving
Let me know is your heart still beating

Are we human?
Or are we dancer?
My sign is vital
My hands are cold
And I’m on my knees
Looking for the answers

You got to let me know

Are we human?
Or are we dancer?
My sign is vital
My hands are cold
And I’m on my knees
Looking for the answers
Are we human
Or are we dancer?

Are we human?
Or are we dancer?

Are we human
Or are we dancer?

Why are the only two options of what you might be human or dancer?  Not a fan.  

Plus their performance on tonight’s Saturday Night Live show was terrible.  I said to my roommate while we were watching, “why is he so awkward”?  And I was informed that that’s Brandon Flowers’, the lead singer, appeal.  I don’t buy it.  I have to say that, after watching him perform both songs, I was a little scared.  He seems awkward to the extreme that he really had to SINGSINGSINGPERFORMDON’TTHINKABOUTITORYOUR’REGOINGTOFREAKOUT!  You know what I mean?  He’s totally pretty, but the new songs suck, and I’m sort of just not buying his shy-guy appeal.